By Noreen Keesey                                      

This article did not start out being about kindness. I am not even sure how the topic ended up capturing my attention, but I am getting used to following where my thoughts lead without asking too many questions. I chuckle as I write that because some of you know how much I love questions. But, back to the topic at hand. The philosopher Plato said, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” On the surface, that seems like pretty easy advice and can perhaps be taken lightly. In the world as we know it, kindness can seem insignificant compared to the problems showing up on TV, radio, and our various social media feeds. There is war, hunger, violence, natural disasters, political turmoil, illness, debilitating human emotions, disease, death, and more. It seems you cannot go a day without evidence of human suffering. With all that going on around us, what can one person do? More than you might think.

Do not underestimate the power of kindness, though it may be easy and seem insignificant. Kindness in its simplest form can be a smile, a compliment, or a minute of assistance.

A few days ago, a man helped me wrangle a 12-foot section of corrugated plastic into my car. I had not asked for help, but it was apparently clear that I needed it. The gentleman’s assistance took only a few moments, but it made my day. Not only was I grateful right then, but I have thought of his kindness several times over the last days and it gives me a little lift each time. The thing is, the man may have thought his assistance was insignificant, but his kindness made a difference to me.

Years ago, my sister was killed in a car crash. At the time of her death, she was on vacation in Florida, my parents were out of the country for a family wedding, and my other sister lived halfway across the country. Friends and strangers offered help in ways that still bring tears to my eyes when I think about them. I cannot possibly list all the ways that people offered comfort and assistance, but the support given to me and my family made our grief more bearable, and when I think of that horrible time I cannot help but to also remember the kindnesses that were extended to us.

Research has shown that there are real benefits to being kind to others, but sometimes the person we most need to extend kindness to is ourselves. How often has that voice in your head listed your faults and flaws in a way that you would never speak to another? Our internal critic can be harsh and unforgiving. We can spend so much of our time and energy on taking care of work and family and responsibilities that we end up exhausted, cranky, or overwhelmed. If you find yourself in any of these states, or realize that your inner critic is on a rampage, please do yourself a favor and do something kind for yourself.

The benefit of being kind to yourself may be evident, but the impact of kindness offered to others may never be known.

I do not have answers for all the challenges that we face, but I do think Plato was on to something. Whenever you can, be kind. It can be cheap, easy, and life changing.

Noreen is a leadership coach and trainer who believes deeply in the Army leadership principle: “Know yourself and seek self-improvement.” She enjoys reading, watching movies, and laughing with friends over a good cocktail. She is uncomfortable with small talk and is scared of moths.