Clayton and Joseph

By Shelly Preszler

“Come on Mom, it’s time to get up and make friends!” My six year-old son’s voice pleaded with a sense of urgency. Oh yes, that’s right. I had promised Joseph the night before we would get up early to make friends in our new neighborhood. I had forgotten how literal kids take everything. If it could only be that easy, I thought to myself. My hair was tussled, my eyes matted shut, and I was feeling a little like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz as we had actually traveled through a tornado the night before to reach our new home in Mandan, North Dakota.
The only thing I knew for sure at that moment was that this mom needed a cup of coffee!

Our family of eight had moved several times over the past ten years for my husband’s career and those moves had taken a toll on me.
I had become very attached to many of our friends and old neighbors over the years and saying goodbye so many times had left a sour taste in my mouth. No worries though, as I was always able to fill that hole in my heart. I baked myself into a little corner of loneliness with every pie and cupcake I made. With every move came a good five pounds of heartache for the friends we had left behind.

I vowed this time would be different. We prayed the night before about our friend situation, and, little did I know, what blessing awaited us both.

My mom was along on this move and she called me to the front door just as I grabbed my cup of coffee. As I looked across the street I couldn’t believe my eyes! A little brown haired boy about six, stood holding his mom’s hand unwilling to cross the street; and there my son stood in our driveway too timid to cross the street also. They just stood there for a moment taking it all in when they finally met in the middle and the rest is history. Clayton and Joseph have been inseparable since that day. They were both six at the time and neither of them had ever had a boy the same age in their neighborhood. What fun! His mother had also been anxiously awaiting the arrival of our family as she had heard through the grapevine that her new neighbors had six kids!!

I also got a bonus out of the deal, as Clayton turned out to be a ‘2 for 1 special’ as they say. His mom, Diana, has become a dear friend to me as well.

It seems school dismissal time at 3:00 can be a great way for moms to make friends as well. I had met several friends by chance in the school parking lot, by just taking the time to say, “Hi” and asking them about their lives and kids. I have got to know so many wonderful women this way that we actually started a Bible study group. One day when my mom was visiting, she stayed for our study and asked the ladies how we had met and almost all of them said, “Why, in the parking lot!”

It has become our standard joke and we now call ourselves the “Parking Lot Friends”. All joking aside though, those ladies were there for me our first fall in our new town when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. They would also be the ones to comfort our family in the days ahead when we lost one precious nephew to cancer, and another beautiful family member to a lengthy illness.

I have come to the conclusion that we all need “Parking Lot Friends.” Not just acquaintances, but friends, who will be there for tough times and for happy ones as well. We need friends who are willing to celebrate with us and also share our sorrow.

So, if you have recently moved, or just want to get to know the other mom in the mini-van this year; take some advice from my son and I. The street can be a pretty good place to make a friend.